What to Do When You Don’t Like What You Have Made

Even saying the title of this post makes me feel uncomfortable! It’s like a nasty little secret that I daren’t say out loud, like having verrucas or a cat that keeps going to the loo in places it shouldn’t.

A quick look on social media or elsewhere on the internet will show plenty of happy looking people proudly showing of the things they have made. I’ve done this myself, plenty of times.

But what doesn’t tend to happen very much is people showing off things they’ve made, then declaring they don’t like them!

It’s not really a surprise. Not liking something we’ve laboured over isn’t a reason to feel proud. It also doesn’t fit with the current trend of pretending that we don’t make mistakes or have bad days (unless they are really not that bad, with a beautiful home and perfect hair even under the half a bag of frozen peas that has escaped onto the kitchen floor).

Not liking what we’ve made feels like the elephant in the room. Even if we usually like what we have made, there are going to be times when we don’t. It’s inevitable, because things don’t always turn out how we expect them to. That’s life!

A few years ago, I made a Spanish style skirt. I was inspired to make it because Spanish skirts had featured on The Great British Sewing Bee, and I wanted to try it. I didn’t use a pattern, and I used left over fabric. The skirt was blue, with a mad frill that was extremely long! I’d patched bits of fabric together, so the whole thing was a bit of a patchwork.

The fit was alright, and it had definitely worked as an idea, but I just didn’t like it. A Spanish style skirt is just not the kind of thing I would ever wear. I’m not really sure what I was thinking, as looking back now, it seems obvious that I wouldn’t have wanted to wear it! I prefer flowy to fitted, and it was too short at the front. Not in a showing your pants to the world kind of too short, but short enough for me to wish it was a bit longer.

It was quite different to the sewing disasters (I’ve had plenty of those!), where the thing I made just didn’t work. That wasn’t the problem. It had worked perfectly fine. The problem was that I didn’t like it.

When you don’t like what you have made, it raises the question of what to do with it. If I had worn the Spanish skirt, I would have felt self conscious and uncomfortable. I didn’t want to throw it away because it wasn’t rubbish! Plus there was all the time and energy I had expended in making it. So here was a thing I wasn’t go to make use of that was taking up space and making me feel bad.

In the end, I put it back in the box of fabric. One day it might resurface as something else. The pieces of the skirt are large enough to reuse, and I have 2 very long frills. I could either use the frills as they are, or I could take the gathers out, which would leave me with some long strips of fabric that I could probably use in some way.

So as well as acknowledging that sometimes we don’t like what we have made, I also want to offer some suggestions for what to do when that happens.

Try To Identify What It Is That You Don’t Like

The first step is to identify what it is that you don’t like about the item. It might be fixable. If this is the case, you could still end up with something you do like and can use.

Some fixable problems:

It’s too short. Could you add a frill, some broderie Anglaise, or some extra fabric? You could try a contrast colour, or contrasting patterned with plain.

You don’t like the neckline. Is it possible to change it? You could recut the neckline if there is enough of it. Or you could add a bit to make it look like you are wearing something else underneath it. Or you could just wear something else underneath it!

The colour doesn’t suit you. This is harder to fix, and it might not be possible. But would dyeing it help?

It doesn’t fit properly. Could you unpick the seams and have another go at getting the fit right? Having a dress form is really useful in this kind of situation. Failing that a helpful friend or sister, or a co-operative husband.

It’s worth saying at this point that it’s alright to leave it for a bit and come back to it. Sometimes all that’s needed is a bit of distance.

If Fixing It Doesn’t Work

It might be that the item isn’t fixable. In that case, you could:

Give it to somebody else. You might know someone who is a similar size to you who would love it.

Try selling it. Ebay or Facebook Marketplace is probably easiest.

Take it to a clothes swap. If there aren’t any near you and you are an outgoing kind of person, you might like to organise one. Diane in Denmark talks about them a lot. One way to do a clothes swap is to invite friends round. They bring clothes they no longer need or don’t fit or whatever, and people take the things they like.

Take it to a nearly new sale. Similar to a clothes swap, a nearly new sale will usually be held in a village hall, school or community centre for a good cause. It’s probably a better idea than a charity shop, which might not take handmade items and where a lot of donations end up in landfill.

Reuse the fabric, zips and other habby in future projects. Even if you don’t have a project in mind right away, you never know when you might need a bit of fabric or two metres of frill.

What To Do About Feeling Bad

Feeling bad because you’ve made something you don’t like can be the most difficult part.

You’ve spent time and energy on making it. You chose the fabric and the pattern or idea. You’ve tried to make it in the right size to fit your body. You ought to love it, but you don’t.

It doesn’t help that everywhere we look, there is the veneer of perfectionism. People wearing outfits that look like they bought them, except they don’t because they’re not going to bump into people wearing the exact same thing. But ours hasn’t turned out like that and we don’t even want to wear it, or use it.

You now have a thing taking up space in your house as a reminder of the time, energy and money you’ve spent on it, and every time you see it, you feel bad.

Life is too short to spend much of it on this kind of thing, so here are some suggestions.

Think about what you have learnt. It might be that you’ve learnt that an old duvet cover in a horrible shade of purple isn’t the way to go (been there!). Or that a certain style of thing looks alright on a model, but doesn’t work so well for your body shape. Maybe that a crocheted bag seemed like a good idea, but now you leave a trail of pens and small change everywhere you go. That still counts as having learnt something!

Perhaps it gave you an opportunity to practise a skill. Zips and buttonholes all get easier and neater with practise. Or maybe it was a chance to practise using a rolled foot hem, putting in pockets or applique. Practise isn’t a waste of time. It’s necessary in order to get better at something.

Maybe it allowed you to try something out. That’s why I made the Spanish skirt that I then never wore! It’s alright to try something and then decide that you don’t like it. You don’t have to like everything.

On the end, if you can give the thing you’ve made to somebody else, and if it makes them happy and it’s off to a new home, you can forget about it. Otherwise, it could go back in the box with your bits of fabric, or into the unfinished projects pile if you have one. It wasn’t a waste. You did something and didn’t work out. That’s to be expected when you are brave enough to have a go. And you never know when what you learnt, or even the thing itself or the vits you used to make it will come in useful.